


You Can't Hide Forever From the Thunder

by TheShorty



Category: Veronica Mars - All Media Types
Genre: A little angsty but hopefully not too much, Anal Sex, Biting, Cupping, Explicit Consent, F/M, Kink Negotiation, Mention of Canonical Abuse, Some Fluff, clips/clamps, light kink, some snark
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-30
Updated: 2018-09-03
Packaged: 2019-07-04 09:31:51
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,766
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15838506
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheShorty/pseuds/TheShorty
Summary: You see, if there’s one thing Logan Echolls knows intimately, it’s pain.





	1. Stand Up and Hold Out Your Hand

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to the most excellent beta @Irma66! This would still be a hot mess of 'maked' if not for your time! :)
> 
> Any remaining mistakes are mine and mine alone. (Please let me know of any egregious ones, won't you?)
> 
> Disclaimer: I don't own them and I don't get paid like or for them, and it's a damn shame. But here we are.

Veronica’s groan as she dragged her mouth away from him made his cock swell, pressing even more uncomfortably against the fly of his jeans. She pushed her head further into the hand twined into her hair.

“Harder.”

It’s a whisper of a thought, slipping out between moans and pants as his lips tease down the sensitive skin of her throat.

Logan twisted the fingers cradling her head until he felt resistance, and gave a little tug for good measure. Her sharp intake of breath made him do it again, before pulling her hair to tilt her head to the other side. The predatory look, eyes narrowing and his tongue swiping over his teeth as if sharpening them, was almost instinctive as he got open access to the other side of her neck. This time, he nipped from her earlobe to her collarbone, stopping at particularly sensitive spots to suck or nibble—nothing hard enough to leave lasting marks but he enjoyed the pink marks that would be gone shortly.

With Logan finally stateside again, they’d been practically living together. They had 9 years (give or take 6 months) to catch up on, and they’d been making excellent progress… not to brag or anything. (Totally to brag. It’s a miracle he actually makes it back to base at all some days, and a damn good thing fighter pilots learn to work on limited sleep because it was touch and go—double entendre intended—there for the first month after he returned stateside.)

Tonight’s exploits, however, were a bit surprising to Logan, given how the evening started. Veronica came home late, slamming the carport door and beelining for the bedroom to change into pajamas, yelling across the house about needing food pronto. There was leftover lasagna, warm and gooey, with garlic bread and a glass of wine waiting for her when she returned to the kitchen after changing into more comfortable clothes. Logan barely managed to get a quick kiss before her mouth was filled with food. She was quiet and he didn’t push, trusting she would talk when she was ready. He started feeling a bit like a creeper after the first few silent bites, though, so he kissed her temple and whispered for her to join him—and the bottle of wine—in the living room when she was done. When she finally curled against him to the couch, she pretended to watch the movie for all of five minutes before straddling him and fervently pressing her mouth to his.

He wasn’t complaining.

“Har.der.” Her voice was more ragged this time, dragging him back to the present and the woman pushing her body against his. This time, Veronica ground her hips into his in time with the distinct syllables of the word, digging her nails into the fabric pulling against his shoulders and pushing her head against the hand that had relaxed in her hair. Logan carefully sank his teeth into the muscle across her shoulder until he heard her hissed response. “Yessssss.”

Logan’s experimented with different levels of suction and sting, enjoying the cycle of needy whimpers and appreciative groans as he played with the intensity of both sensations against her shoulder. When he finally dragged his mouth away, he grinned at the oblong, maroon bruise adorning her skin, considerately placed where it could be covered by her general work attire.

At least, that’s what he’d tell her when she saw it in the bathroom mirror later.

Veronica’s hands thrust impatiently against his shirt; her need to touch his skin distracted her after opening the first few buttons. Logan reclined back against her hands, trapping her hands between skin and fabric. Her nails scratched and scraped against him, movements jerky and uncoordinated as she tried to keep her neck and shoulders aligned with his questing mouth while working to get his shirt off. Her shirt and bra were long gone, lost within minutes of straddling him.

He huffed at a particularly deep pull across his skin, a growl emanating from low in his throat at the sensation. Logan sucked in a deep breath through his nose as the burn spread, swallowing hard when she whispered a soft “sorry” against his ear. Cocking his head to the side, he smiled up at her. “I’ve had worse.” He winked as he continued, “You remember those crazy long nails Lilly kept, right? She could be downright vicious sometimes.”

Veronica’s chest shook as she laughed and nodded at the memory of her best friend’s ridiculous nails; the mesmerizing bounce of her breasts drew his eyes, and then his mouth, down. Her laughter turned into moans as he worked her breast, avoiding more than a light touch across her nipple. She finally disentangled one hand from his shirt and anchored it in his hair, moving her torso as she pulled against him to get the sensations she so desperately wanted.

“Ahhhh…” she sighed when he complied with her unspoken request, lavishing attention on the previously teased nipple. The first drag of his canines down to the tight peak of her nipple had her crushing her hips against his, but something unexpected slipped from her mouth with the second. “More, Logan. It’s okay… make it hurt.”

His hands dropped from her body. His instinctive response is harsh and short.

“No.”

Veronica sighed, her head dropping to his shoulder as she wrapped herself around him, pressing against him like she’s his second skin. She waited until Logan curled himself around her and leaned his cheek against hers. “That probably wasn’t the best way to broach it, was it?”

You see, if there’s one thing Logan Echolls knows intimately, it’s pain.

Physical, mental, emotional… receiving, giving… he can recall any number of events that left him drowning in it with unnerving clarity.

He had to remind himself to breathe as his thoughts race and coil, trying to make sense of her words and his reaction.

Logan had learned over the years that he could use pain to either focus his mind or distract him from difficult things—thoughts, emotions, sensations. He even knew that sometimes—in moderation—pain could be enjoyable, could enhance pleasure.

Logan _knew_ this, but Veronica pressing those words against his skin… _make it hurt…_

He talked a good game in high school, often being the first to make a quip about kinky sex or flashing a lewd grin while suggesting handcuffs or some other fetish accessory. But the reality was that Logan had always been very careful to keep anything resembling abuse out of his bedroom, especially when it came to sex with people he cared about—when it came to sex with Veronica.

That didn’t mean their sex life was all candlelight and soft caresses, though. When they were together, their bodies were always desperate for contact, for sensation, for satiation. They’d had their share of intense sex, both in college and since they’d been back together—hands buried in hair, backs slamming into corners and surfaces along the way, hands rough and bruising, intensity vibrating through their bodies until the shattering force fuses them together again.

Veronica shifted against him, bringing him back into the present. He pulled his head back, planting a kiss against her temple before exhaling sharply.

“I…” he swallowed audibly and tried again. “That felt like you want more than our normal rough-and-tumble.” It’s not a question.

Eyelashes fluttered against his shoulder; her answer was a barely whispered, “I do.” When Veronica starts to slide off him, Logan tightened his arms around her, unwilling to break contact yet. He started planting light, soothing kisses along her neck in an attempt to calm them both and break the tension that had bloomed with his response.

“Please,” he whispers, “don’t…” Logan’s racing thoughts won’t coalesce into sensible words and phrases, but the panic rising at the thought of losing contact with her in the middle of this turmoil supplanted everything; he hadn’t felt this panicked since… well, since she left 9 years ago. “Don’t go.”

She kissed the crook of his neck, the collarbone under her cheek before pulling back to finally look at his face. “Can we at least rearrange a bit, then? I’m not as young as I used to be.” She scrunched her face a bit as she rubbed her knees; they both know it’s an excuse, that they’d let slide right now. The panic he felt was reflected in her eyes. She was the one to break their shared gaze, looking around the room. _Planning an escape route._

He bit his lip, waiting, and was surprised when Veronica resisted her instinct to escape. No lightening the mood or playing off her request and the resulting vulnerability with a well-placed quip. No flight from the room.

He gave her a knowing, appreciative smile, kissed the tip of her nose, and shifted with her. They eventually settled into a more comfortable position: him sitting up against the armrest with his legs stretched along the couch, her in his lap with her legs hanging off the front of the couch. With one hand, he traced undefinable patterns into her skin; the other she wrapped with both of her own, fingers circling each knuckle in turn where it lay in her lap.

When he could no longer stand his whirling thoughts, he rested his forehead against the side of her head. “Okay. Let’s talk.” Logan was actually impressed at how well they were adulting right now, but pushed the thought out of his mind so they could stay on track with the conversation. “I’m sorry that I dismissed you so quickly and that I was… that it sounded… it all came out wrong. I’m sorry, Veronica. I guess… what I should have said was…” He took a deep breath before trying again.

“What do you mean when you say ‘make it hurt’?”

Veronica smoothed a hand across his cheek. “It’s okay. I shouldn’t have just dropped it on you, especially like that. ‘ _Because we both know your history with your asshole abusive father, among many other painful things in our lives’_ hung unspoken in the air between them.

“I guess my ability to talk about sex… is still less than stellar.” She added, pulling back just enough to look him in the eye. In a move that reminded him so much of high school Veronica that it made his chest hurt, she jerked a thumb towards herself and muttered. ‘Still a trainwreck, apparently’.

Before he had a chance to respond, she met his eyes again and forged on. “Let me try to explain. It’s been a really hard week. I’ve barely slept, and my mind is in overdrive because of some cases that have… become particularly sensitive, shall we say? We,” she waved her hand between them, “haven’t seen each other much either, and we know how cantankerous I get when that happens. Normally a little tongue twister…or a little more—” a simultaneous eyebrow quirk made them both smirk, “with you slows my brain down, lets me escape for a little while. But… it wasn’t working.”

Logan slowly nodded his head as he took in what she was saying. She chewed her bottom lip, watching him. Waiting for him to say something. But he could tell she still had more to say, so he just nodded for her to continue. After chewing on her lip for another minute, Veronica started talking again.

“The first significant relationship I had after leaving Neptune was during my senior year at Stanford.” Logan bit his cheek to stop the questions from tumbling out; jealousy was unwarranted and they both knew it, but it was still hard to quell when they were both feeling so vulnerable. Veronica’s thumb ghosted against his skin, soothing him while she continued her story. “That year was the most stressful school year I had at Stanford, and, since I was staying away from the adrenaline-laced PI world, I started taking… risks I hadn’t taken since I moved to Stanford.” His arms instinctively tightened around her and his jaw clenched, knowing the anxiety and fear caused by a ruthlessly reckless Veronica.

“One night, after picking me up from a… situation—scared freshmen girls, drunken frat boys, yours truly between them with ripped clothes and a busted rib from being slammed into the bar before I got the biggest asshole under control with Mr. Sparky—” a vein throbbed in Logan’s temple, “he told me that if I needed an adrenaline rush, he could think of sexier, and more mutually satisfying, ways of getting it. When I told him I wasn’t really into whips and chains, he laughed at me and said that whips and chains aren’t required if you were creative enough. It got me thinking, and eventually we played around with it. More than the adrenaline rush, though, I found that sometimes it could actually shut my brain up in ways I hadn’t experienced since…” her voice trailed off and her cheeks flushed, a sure sign of her embarrassment.

“Should we call this color blush or bashful?” he teased as his fingers traced the tint of her cheeks. Veronica swatted his chest and then buried her face in her hands. “Since what, Veronica?”  Logan was pretty sure he knew the answer, but the ego boost was always enjoyable.

Veronica’s tongue darted out to wet her lip, then she smiled. “Since I’d had sex with you.”

He grinned at her for a minute before concern overtook him yet again. “So, does sex with me not do it anymore?” Leave it to this discussion to bring up his rare sexual insecurity.

“No, Logan, that’s not it.” There was no derision or judgement in Veronica’s voice, only calm understanding. “It still does, more often than not. But sometimes, it’s more than just you can overcome. Though, now that we’re talking about it, I’m not sure my heart or my lungs can handle having this kind of sex with you; it might short circuit my brain permanently. I’m not sure I’d actually like _being_ Barbie for the rest of my life.”

Logan couldn’t stop the smirk from crossing his face. “If so, does that mean I can keep you as my personal sex slave forever? It might be a hardship, having you at my beck and call, but I am willing to sacrifice myself if it will help you live your best life.” Veronica’s elbow connected with his ribs and he curled his shoulders in protectively, grunting at the impact.

“Should have stuck with Kendall or Madison if that’s what you wanted, bucko.”

He’s glad they’ve gotten to the point where she can occasionally joke with him about the rough times in their first attempts at dating, but mixing those memories with his current raw state brought an unexpected jolt of anguish. She must have caught the flit of darkness crossing his face, because she pressed herself tightly against him again. “Sorry. Bad timing for that joke.”

“It’s ok,” he said but stayed quiet for a few minutes, soaking in her scent and the warmth of her body against his before backtracking to their original conversation.

“So, pain in some form helps clear your head. I get that. What… kinds of pain, though?” That was the bigger question, wasn’t it? Logan understood that pain increases pleasure, can clear the cobwebs and render the mouse wheel temporarily motionless… but he’s still not sure he can actually hurt her.

“Over the years, I’ve experimented with different things. It’s kind of hit and miss what works for me. I do enjoy some impact play, but not all of it. Like canes? Don’t really like ‘em. But spanking can be really useful.” She smoothed her hands across the furrows in his brow before continuing. “Logan, we don’t have to do that kind of stuff though. I know… I know you might not be able to do that because it’s too close to what Aaron did to you. I’m not asking you for that; there’s plenty of other stuff to do. And if you can’t do any of it, then we will figure out something else to do. Maybe skydiving?”

And just like that, his shoulders relaxed. She knew. She knew he would be concerned about becoming what he hated the most. She knew the demons he fought, was willing to talk about it, willing to figure out something that worked for them both.

Some part of him knew she would understand, but hearing her say it, out loud... Logan didn’t even know that he needed to hear her say it, but the tightness in his chest eased as soon as she did.

She seemed surprised by his kiss, but she returned it with equal zeal. When they parted for air, he finally responded. “Only if I’m flying the plane.” She cocked her head to the side, as if contemplating this idea, a gesture she knew he couldn’t resist. After kissing her again, he continued. “But I think we can work something out that doesn’t involve you being 13,000 feet in the air and praying your parachute works.”

They kept talking in between kisses, with words becoming more sporadic as their activities turned more libidinous and less loquacious. Before they went too far, though, Logan needed to get something else out. Pulling away from her with a groan, he rested his forehead against hers while they both caught their breath. “Two more things,” he eventually panted out. “First, I can’t do this immediately. Give me a little time to do some… research. And we’ll need to talk more. Ok?”

Veronica was nodding before he ever finished the statement. “Of course. That’s… probably how this should have gone, instead of me blurting it out like that. What’s the second thing?”

“Thank you.” His voice was quiet, his eyes solemn.

“Uh…You’re welcome?” Veronica replied, confused.

His kiss this time was barely a brush against her lips. “Thank you. For trusting me to do this, for being willing to talk to me, for learning how to do this with me. I’d say we did a pretty good job of adulting with this, wouldn’t you?”

Her resulting smile was wide and bright. “I agree, Lieutenant. Thank you, too, for talking it out with me despite my impulsive approach. I know it’s not _normal_ but...”

His laugh interrupted her. “Normal is something you’ve always wanted, Veronica, not me. I love our not-normal but absolutely extraordinary life. After almost a decade of trying to do normal, without you, I can say without a doubt: I wouldn’t have it, or you, any other way.”

Her lips were warm against his ear as she leaned forward, whispering softly against his temple. “Want to know what other adult activity I’d like to partake in right now?” She laughed as he wiggled out from under her and stood up, holding out his hand to her.

“I have an idea.” He mumbled against her skin as they made their way to the bedroom, bumping into furniture and walls as he buried his hands in her hair, latching onto her other shoulder to make a matching bruise…


	2. Smile into the Fear

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Veronica’s whimpers make his cock twitch.
> 
> That fact is not surprising. Veronica’s whimpers, or memories of them, have made his cock twitch for over a decade now.
> 
> What is surprising is what’s currently making her whimper, and how much Logan is enjoying it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, yet again, to the excellent beta skills and general-smut-supportiveness of @Irma66. :)

“When you said you wanted to look more closely at some options, buddy, you weren’t kidding were you?” Veronica placed her cup in the sink before sauntering back to the couch. With a grin, she settled between Logan’s knees, where she’d been sitting for over an hour now as he flipped through clips and websites, asking her about things that looked interesting to her or that she had enjoyed in previous encounters.

From his position behind her, he scraped his teeth lightly across the crook of her neck and then tucked his chin behind her shoulder, pressing his lips into her skin as he concentrated on the laptop screen in front of them. It was a rather difficult task to pull off with only one hand. Earlier, when all Veronica could do was stutter and turn the shade of a carnation at his second clip, Logan had decided upon a more… direct test of her interest—his hand down her shorts, where he could feel her clit swell and moisture drip onto his fingers.

Never one to back down from a challenge—especially one involving sex with Veronica—Logan had found an interesting variety of sensations he thought he could enjoy inflicting upon her, and was pleasantly surprised that she’d only experienced two of them before. She had heard of a few of the others, but never got around to trying them. The last clip had distracted them for a few minutes when Logan couldn’t resist stroking her clit, whispering his fantasy about that particular activity in her ear until she was riding her orgasm out against his fingers as he watched her in awed wonder.

After glasses of water and cleaning up, they now found themselves cuddled together again on the couch.

“Last one for now, Bobcat, I promise.” His hand rested against her belly, heavy and warm. At her sigh, he inched down a little more, waiting for her to tell him if she was up for more stimulation right now.

“It’s ok.” she whispered to him, spreading her legs further apart in invitation. Veronica inhaled sharply as his fingers danced across her hypersensitive clit, leaning back into him as she pushed her hips forward for more contact. “But we should probably hurry this along. I’m getting hungry and…would like to have dessert first tonight, I think.” A wide grin spread across his face, and a sideways glance at Veronica revealed a similar expression on hers.

He trailed kisses from her shoulder up to the sensitive spot behind her ear. “I think that can be arranged,” Logan murmured before nudging her head forward to watch the final clip.

Veronica rolled her eyes at him, not that he was paying attention her reflection in the screen instead of the final clip of the night or anything. She watched the first minute or so of the clip, but the shift in her body told him that she’d gotten lost in her own thoughts well before the end of the clip.

She was still nervous about trying some of this with him; Logan could see it in the number of worried glances she tossed his way throughout the night. When he finally asked her about it, she talked about how she could keep an emotional distance with others she dated or played with, but that she wasn’t sure how the fact that Logan could read her like a book would change the experience for her.

It was a daunting amount of vulnerability, especially for someone who’s never really been good at baring her soul.

But… the more they talked, the more comfortable she seemed. No question, the night had started off a little awkward and stiff; Veronica could barely string two words together for the first few clips. For reasons he wasn’t sure he'd ever understand, she still seemed embarrassed at their overt sex talk, but had relaxed incrementally with each clip until they fell back into their normal, fast-paced snarky banter. Well, normal except that his hand was pressed against her in a most enjoyable fashion. Although really, that wasn’t that unusual either.

Who knew actually talking about things could make things better and not worse?

Neither of them had much time to dwell on their thoughts right then, though, because as soon as the clip was over, Logan was pulling her down onto her back, mumbling about chocolate syrup and cherries.

* * *

Logan walked into the living room, knowing his face told Veronica everything she needed but didn't want to know. She didn’t ask, though, just waited for him to tell her.

“Next Friday, for three weeks.”

Her exhale was more surprised than angry.

Ten days notice… the Navy wasn’t big on forewarning.

Assholes.

“At least it’s not six months again.” Logan wasn’t sure if she was trying to convince him or herself.

“It’s just a training cruise, Veronica. We’ll even be stopping in Hawaii for a day or two around the halfway mark. You could fly out and meet me there if you wanted.” He looked hopeful, but she was shaking her head before he even finished the sentence.

“You know I’ve got too much to do here right now.” They sighed in unison, and Logan finally crossed the room to wrap her in a hug, planting a kiss against the crown of her head. She whispered again, “At least it’s not 6 months.”

* * *

An envelope. Smooth, crisp, white, with her name scrawled across the front in his loopy script. Logan hoped its contents would give her something pleasant and non-work related to focus on, plan for, dream about.

A little stress relief over the next few weeks apart.

Logan placed the envelope on his pillow the morning he left for his training cruise, when he came back to grab his seabag after their early morning breakfast. Then, he slid off her pillowcase and stuffed it into his bag, heading for the door before she came looking for him.

The surprise only worked if she didn’t see it before he left; she’d demand he tell her what was in the envelope otherwise.

As she drove, Veronica filled the silence with ramblings about her upcoming day. A client meeting at 9:00 AM, tailing a potentially philandering husband at lunch, work—emails, surveillance footage, phone calls—she’d ignored for the last two days to spend time with Logan.

Logan listened, stoic and still beside her. Before her rambling took a turn into the completely obscure, his hand covered hers where it rested on the gearshift, squeezing her fingers lightly before twining his between them.

The rest of the ride was quiet.

* * *

“Have you opened it yet?”

_“Hello, flyboy, how are you? Glad you’re enjoying Hawaii. Me, you ask? Oh, I’m wonderful, thanks for your concern.”_ Logan huffed out a chuckle at the scowl on the tiny face on his phone. Being in Hawaii for mid-cruise leave meant he could spend his afternoon off talking, in real time, with Veronica.

He lifted his free hand in a gesture of surrender. “I’m sorry. I’m just… Hi, Bobcat. I miss you. How are you?”

_“Hi. I miss you too. I’m… keeping busy with work. But we’ve got all afternoon, right?”_ Logan nodded, and then screencapped the grin on Veronica’s face.

_“Hey! I didn’t dress for pictures, mister.”_

“I need it to get me through the next ten days.” Logan batted his eyelashes at her through the screen, eliciting a genuine laugh as she exaggerated rolling her eyes.

_“Memory getting fuzzy already, old man?”_ she teased, one eyebrow raised.

“You’re all I need to remember. Well, you and how to fly a fighter jet.”

_“Definitely don’t forget that. You promised to come back to me **in one piece.** ” _

Logan smiled softly at her. “Always, Veronica.”

She nodded, throat jumping as she swallowed hard, then tried to change the topic. _“So… what should I have opened?”_

Logan’s heart dropped as his eyes widened in surprise. _Surely she hadn’t missed it._ “The…the envelope?” he stuttered. “I put it on my pillow for you when I left. Didn’t you see it?”

Veronica snorted as she took a screenshot of him. At his indignant expression, she quipped _“It’s not often I get picture proof of sex-god Logan Echolls being nervous about something related to sex.”_

His cheeks puffed out as he sighed in relief. “You opened it.” His voice was steady, but he felt the tightness of residual anxiety around his eyes. Veronica nodded at him as her cheeks tinged pink.

_“Yeah…”_ was all she said before looking away. _“I think I would like that… To try what you suggested, I mean. Is there anything you want to talk about right now?”_ His fingers itched to feel the flush crossing her chest, to let his lips taste her as they followed the pink tint down her body. If she sensed the direction of his thoughts, she gave no hint, as she kept her eyes glued to the screen.

“Do you have a safeword?”

It was one of the first things he asked about in his surprise letter, so he’s confused by the startled look on Veronica’s face.

_“Uh… yeah. I had to think about it, but I came up with one.”_ She looked down and picked at something offscreen, Old Veronica’s habits rearing their head. Logan watched a myriad of expressions cross Veronica's face as she fought an internal battle between old habits and new desires. Old Veronica would have avoided this conversation in any medium; New Veronica wanted to be more forthcoming. Since they couldn’t afford to fall back into old habits, he waited, but when it became apparent that Veronica wasn’t going to break the silence, Logan did.

“Care to share? Correct me if I’m wrong, Bobcat, but I’m pretty sure the only way the _word_ is _safe_ is if I know it beforehand.” Her face snapped back to the screen, his expectant words breaking her reverie.

A smirk pulled at her lips. _“Nah. I figured I’d see if you could figure it out in the off-chance I actually used it.”_

That pulled a chuckle from Logan. “What’s your safeword, Veronica?”

_“Madison.”_

Logan’s eyes widened in shock before he laughed so hard he almost dropped his phone. “Decided to go for the biggest boner killer you could think of, eh, Bobcat?”

It was Veronica’s turn to laugh _. “Short of talking about my dad during sex… yep.”_ She snorted as Logan faux-shuddered.

“I think you could have _not_ told me, and I still would have guessed that meant stop… but thanks for letting me know ahead of time anyways.” They fell silent, silly smiles on their faces as they studied one another over their respective screens. Veronica ran her finger across the smooth glass of her phone, momentarily obscuring the camera as she did.

Again, Logan broke the silence. “You had to think about it, eh? It hasn’t been Madison every time you’ve done this, then.”

Veronica pursed her lips for a moment before letting out a short puff of air. _“No, that’s just for you.”_ The look on her face told him everything he needed to know: she knew, _she knew_ the question her confession would instigate.

“What was it before?”

Eyes averted, she whispered. _“Bobcat.”_ Logan’s sharp inhale seemed to echo in the empty hotel room.

“Veronica,” he kept his voice soft, “please look at me.” Biting her lower lip, she raised her head until her eyes met his across the screen. “Does it bother you when I call you Bobcat, Veronica?”

_“No, no, no. Logan. No. It’s not... that.”_ Her eyes didn’t drop again, but Logan could see her scrambling for how best to explain herself. _Maybe all of this would have been easier in person._ He was ready to table the conversation when she took a deep breath and plunged on. _“It... They… They weren’t you.”_ Veronica shook her head, squeezing her eyes closed like she was trying to wish the explanation into being. _“They never knew why I chose the term. Safewords should be something that you can remember even in times of panic, something your mind knows will bring you safety, that will bring whatever is happening to an immediate stop. Safewords are protective.”_

Her cheeks were on fire, her breathing shallow. Logan didn’t know what she saw on his face when she glanced at the screen again, but whatever it was seemed to spur her on. _“I was pretty sure people wouldn’t understand if my safeword was ‘Logan’. I’m not enough of an emotional masochist, our past notwithstanding, to want to explain our backstory to every person I played with. So, bobcat it was. Weird enough to not come up in normal sex talk with other people, but… I always felt safe with you, and even if I couldn’t—or wouldn’t—say it, I have always trusted you. I knew that if I ever needed to use my safeword… that was one I would never forget.”_

Logan’s jaw clenched as he tried to steady his voice. “Bobcat it is, then, Veronica.” Logan wanted to tell her what her confession— _I always felt safe with you. Always trusted you._ —meant to him, but the words wouldn’t come. He rubbed the heel of his hand across his eyes, pressing back against the tears that threatened.

He settled for a husky “God, I wish I could kiss you right now,” instead. His voice still held a small tremble, despite his best efforts.

Veronica smiled _. “I wish you could too. Ten days. I’m… well, I’m not sorry for telling you that, but I’m sorry this got a little heavier than I think either of us expected.”_ Her shoulders relaxed at his weak chuckle. _“So… uh… anything else you want to talk about now? Or that I need to do for the weekend, besides stock up on food?”_

Logan’s sudden grin almost split his face in two. “Condoms. Stocking up on food and condoms should be all you need to do. I’ll take care of the rest, _Bobcat_.”

_“You’ve already planned it, haven’t you?”_ she turned her head slightly to the side and eyed him warily.

Bobbing his eyebrows, Logan’s grin turned into an unabashed leer. “Not completely,” he answered, “but some of it, yes. Other parts of it will depend on what you’re interested in from the list I offered.”

Veronica bit her lip and wiggled onto her back in bed. _“Care to tell me about any of these plans?”_ Her tone was teasing, but they both knew how much she hated surprises.

“Not yet. You’re just going to have to be patient.” Veronica responded with an exasperated snort, which Logan promptly ignored. “Now, tell me about this case that’s keeping you so busy…”

_“I’d rather you tell me some other ways you like to… how did you phrase it in your letter…help me destress. It’s very lonely here in our bed this afternoon and I’m suddenly feeling very tense…”_

* * *

Veronica’s whimpers make his cock twitch.

That fact is not surprising. Veronica’s whimpers, or memories of them, have made his cock twitch for over a decade now.

What is surprising is what’s currently making her whimper, and how much Logan is enjoying it. He lifted his head with her nipple caught between his teeth, enjoying her body arching under him. His hands rested against her shoulders, holding them lightly against the bed, stopping her from moving with him.

Her whimpers turned to low groan as he continued to lift his head, her nipple stretching until the tension finally pulled it from between his teeth. Her breast bounced gently with the recoil as a soft huff of relief escaped her mouth. Watching her face carefully for signs of distress, he leaned back down to lavish soft attention on the offended nipple before starting the process over again.

Logan slid one hand down her shoulder to her other breast, capturing the nipple between his thumb and first finger and rolling it with intensity that matched his ministrations on the other.

Her whimpers morphed into soft cries of pleasure at the additional sensation. Her hips pushed up against his, seeking more, seeking friction, seeking relief.

Grinning at the moan that escaped her throat as her nipple pulled from between his teeth, Logan sat back against his heels between her legs. “Not yet, Veronica. You’ve got a long night ahead of you.” Her eyes were closed, but she still furrowed her brows at his words; he could feel the irritated glare through her eyelids, even if she never opened her eyes.

“You know how to make this stop. All you have to do is tell me—whether that’s with your safeword or just telling me to stop.”

Veronica opened one eye and met his gaze, then grinned at him. “I know, Logan. Now kiss me and get on with it.”

Instead of kissing her, as requested, Logan slid off the end of the bed to stand above her. He started at her, searing into his mind all the small details of Veronica as she was on their bed right now: arms above her head, heels of her hands pressing lightly against the headboard, light teeth marks surrounding her taut nipples, open thighs revealing how wet she already was.

If she asks later, it’s totally to make her wait, to prolong their mutual pleasure, and not because he still can’t believe she’s here sometimes, with him, in their bed.

Logan crawled into bed and laid alongside her, running a hand up her belly and around each breast before travelling back down again. Goosebumps erupted across her skin. On the next circle around her breast, he caught her nipple and twisted it. Her squeal at the unexpected action pitched higher when he released a clamp onto her nipple.

“Shit—” was all she could sputter as she exhaled sharply at the sensation. He repeated the action, but without such an enjoyable squeal, on the other nipple.

Veronica pulled a deep breath in through her nose, then scrunched her nose up.

He managed to hold off for asking why she made that face for... about 30 seconds before curiosity got the best of him. “Problem?”

She chuckled softly before answering him. “No, I just… didn’t think about what would happen before I took that deep breath.”

Logan snorted, then flicked his tongue over the little tip of nipple sticking out from the clamp. When she sucked in another harsh breath, he did it again before switching to the other nipple. “Do you want more, Veronica?” he asked, kissing lightly around her breasts.

“Yes” she said on an exhale. Logan grabbed the package of plastic clothespins he bought for the occasion and settled between her thighs, spreading her wide and running a finger across her clit. His jaw clenched and his cock jumped at how wet she was, but he pulled his hand away before she could make more contact.

One by one, Logan added clothespins around her breasts, first in the cardinal directions and then randomly in between. Veronica’s eyes flew open as Logan leaned down to kiss her, the motion shifting the clothespins, only to be greeted with Logan’s smug grin. “Asshole,” she grumbled between kisses.

His grin only got larger as he pressed his chest against hers, the pins twisting and pulling as they flattened between them. Her breath was coming in short bursts when he finally broke their kiss and moved to nibble that spot behind her ear that always drove her crazy. “I bet it hurts more with you panting like that. Should I stop?”

Logan laughed as she pushed against his shoulder and then grunted at the pain shooting through her at their combined movement. “Alright, alright,” he said between chuckles, “I’ll take them off. Maybe it’s time to move my next activity.”

“Ugh. This is worse than putting them on,” she mumbled at him.

That stopped him, hand against one of the clamps on her nipple. “Wait, really?”

Veronica nodded at him and then scrunched her nose again. “Yeah. The blood coming back makes the nerves go crazy. It can be intense. Can I make a request?”

“Yeah, of course. What do you need?”

“Take the ones on my nipples off last… and suck on them for a couple of seconds after you take them off? It’s still intense but… it helps.” Veronica finally met his eyes as her voice trailed off.

Logan nodded a couple of times and then grinned at her. “The sacrifices I make for you… I will absolutely suck on your nipples if it will make you feel better, Bobcat.”

In reverse order from how he placed them, Logan removed each clothespin. When only the final two remained, he waited until she nodded before taking the first off, catching the nipple between his lips and sucking firmly as she hissed and dug her fingers into his shoulders. Slowly he eased the suction against her nipple. His chin rested against her breastbone until she found his eyes.

“That okay?” he asked quietly.

Veronica nodded. “Yeah, Logan. That was perfect. Ready for the last one?”

“You’re taking my lines, Mars,” he responded, wiggling the last clamp and enjoying one final gasp before he removed it and caught her nipple between his lips.

When he finally released her nipple, he kissed his way down her body until he rested between her thighs.

“Ready for Act 2?” he asked, letting his breath play across her sensitive flesh. He barely heard her whispered “uhhuh” before he delved between her lips to find her clit with his lips while two fingers slipped easily inside her.

“God, Logan. Yes,” she muttered, arching her hips and pressing against him, trying for more.

Releasing her clit with a loud pop, Logan’s smile turned devious. “You didn’t think it would be that easy, did you?”

“I… uh…” was all Veronica could get out before Logan’s lips returned to her clit, sucking and flicking while he slowly fucked her with his fingers until she was right on the edge of orgasm.

He withdrew fully from her right before she could crash over the precipice.

“Logan!” she practically yelled at him.

“Yes, Bobcat?” he responded, the innocence in his voice incongruent with the nefarious smirk plastered across his face.

“UGH!” she growled.

“I did mention it wouldn’t be that easy, didn’t I? I could have sworn…Ow!” He laughed at her and rubbed his shoulder where her knee slammed into him. “You’re the one that marked an interest in orgasm delay.” He smiled at Veronica's expression—as petulant as it was incredulous—and massaged his shoulder again in mock-offense before asking. “So, shall I move on?”

“Depends on what ‘moving on’ entails. Are you just going to tease me and not let me come again?” She scowled as Logan looked to the ceiling in contemplation.

“Maybe. I have other things too, though, if you’d like to try them.” As he spoke, his hand lifted from the bed and slid into the cleft of her ass, flitting over the tight opening there. “Other things you’ve expressed interest in trying.”

Veronica gasped and bit her lip, her cheeks immediately flushing hot.

“Really, Bobcat? I bite you and put clamps all over your boobs, but a little anal makes you blush?” he teased, continuing with a constant, firm circular movement. When she still doesn’t meet his eyes, his hand stops.

“Veronica, look at me.” It took his quiet command for her to finally meet his eyes. “We don’t have to do this. It’s your call.  There are other things I planned as possibilities for the night. Do you still want to try anal?” He watched her throat as she swallowed once, then again.

“Yeah, Logan, I want to try it. I just… this feels a lot more intimate to me than anything you’ve done so far.” Her blush spread as he smiled at her, but he didn’t give her a chance to think about that too much before his lips crushed hers. His fingers picked up their slow rhythm again, firm circles as he felt the muscles of her ass flex and relax instinctively.

He kissed her until they were both gasping for air. When they broke the kiss to breath, he pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead. “Thank you, Veronica,” he whispered against her before grabbing the lube from the bedside table and trailing back down her body. Looking up from between her spread knees yet again, he smiled at her.

“You can come as many times as you want.” He said with a wink, and when her breath hitched in her throat as he finished his statement, his face twisted into what one might classify as a sadistic grin. “Maybe I can even get a few more out of you after you think you’re done.”

“I’ve created a monster,” Veronica groaned as his head dipped between her thighs yet again, but the only response he gave her was the feeling of his head nodding against her thigh and the cool slipperiness of lube being spread against her ass.

“Breathe, Veronica,” He instructed softly as his tongue began a slow trip from her entrance to her clit. “Just keep breathing and tell me if anything hurts.” He felt her hand come to rest on the back of his head when he began to gently suck her clit. Logan pushed steady but gentle until his first knuckle disappeared into her ass; she groaned at the intrusion but gave no sign of discomfort. His tongue repeated its trip from stem to stern and back again.

“Fuck. More,” she ground out as his tongue flicked lightly across the tip of her clit.

Logan’s groan vibrated against her, causing her to jerk her hips against his face. As she relaxed her hips back to the bed, he slipped his finger in past the second knuckle. He lightly bit her clit and began to twist and bend the finger in her ass, smiling as she whimpered above him.

Slowly, he pulled his finger out and pushed it back in, feeling her sphincters tighten and relax around him. “Okay?” he asked quietly against her, setting a slow thrusting pace.

“Yeah, it’s… good,” she stammered out after a few strokes.

“Ready for more?” A second finger brushed against her. She nodded vigorously.

On the next outstroke, he added a second finger, pressing easily past the first ring of muscle. The resistance of the second ring stopped him. Pulling back, he added a bit more lube and pressed against her again. “Breathe and relax, V.” He found her clit again and played his tongue against it, swirling against it in a way that always drove her crazy.

It took seconds for her to crash into her first orgasm, crying out and pushing herself against his face. He followed her jerking easily, easing her through her orgasm as his fingers slipped past the formerly resistant muscle at the peak of her ecstasy. Veronica howled—the only word he could think for the sound, primal and loud and something he’d never heard before—as she slammed herself down against his hand over and over again.

“God. Logan,” she groaned, her hand fisted against the top of his head, his fingers buried in her ass, muscles rippling around him when aftershocks took her body. “That was…”

“Uh-huh,” was all he could manage in response. He wiggled his fingers inside her and smiled as it set off an aftershock. “Not done yet.” His tone was wicked—impressively so, considering he was staring at her in stunned admiration. Turning his head, he bit into the tender flesh of her inner thigh until she shrieked, then watched in amazement as a gush of wetness poured from her cunt.

He ran a finger from his free hand through the wetness, then his tongue, before raising his eyes to meet hers. “You really enjoy the pain, don’t you?” he asked, softly.

Her eyes, glassy from adrenaline and endorphins, became apprehensive as he waited for her to answer. “Yeah, Logan. The right pain, I do.” Her face was blank, a mask of neutrality carefully crafted over the years and dropped into place in preparation for his revulsion, his rejection.

Logan couldn’t stand it.

“I love you, Veronica. This doesn’t change that. This is… unexpected, yes. But it’s also… _amazing._ Extraordinary. Interesting. Sexy as hell. You. It’s just another way you’re _you_ and I want to be a part of this as much as I want to be in every other part of your life.”

Logan was glad she was so tiny he could kiss her without having to break any other connection with her. She kissed him like she was drowning, frantic and wild, and he met her urgency, pouring himself into their kiss until she finally broke away with a gasp for air.

“Keep going, Logan. Please,” she whispered, her breath soft against his mouth as their foreheads pressed together.

“Just one more thing I planned to try tonight, but first…” After some patting around on the bed near his legs, Logan produced a black buttplug, not very large but definitely enough that she wouldn’t forget its presence. He slowly withdrew his fingers from her ass and lubed up the toy before his “clean” hand began to drift through the folds of her sopping wet cunt.

“If it gets too much, tell me.” He waited for her nod before settling his head between her thighs. His lips found her clit. Two fingers eased inside her and curled up until they found the bundle of nerves against the front wall of her cunt.

He began gently circling her clit with his tongue while he worked his other two hands in a juxtaposition of thrusting, pulling his fingers almost all the way out of her cunt while pushing steadily against the plug, then changing directions with both. Pushing and pulling. Pulling and pushing. Never letting up against her clit, but never giving enough to push her over the edge.

Veronica groaned and wiggled above him, not pushing into him but not pulling away either. Eyes closed, head thrown back, chest arched up... she was gorgeous. Relaxed. Enjoying herself. Enjoying everything he gave her.

The largest part of the plug finally eased past her internal sphincter and the rest slipped easily into place. Veronica grunted at the feeling and wiggled her hips.

“How does it feel?”

“Weird. Not bad, though. Just… different.” He gently nipped the bruise forming on her inner thigh before sitting back against his heels to look at her.

“Ready for the last thing I want to try?”

“Probably,” she murmured. “What is it?”

“Remember the video clip from a few weeks ago? With the suction cup looking things?”

“I remember riding your hand through a really great orgasm.”

“Yeah, that one. Apparently, it’s called cupping and can have some really interesting effects when applied to particular areas. Don’t move… too much.”

With that, Logan slipped off the edge of the bed and headed to the bathroom, where he washed his hands before returning to the bedroom with a few interesting looking plastic tubes.

“These aren’t the fanciest, but they should work to see how we like it.”

“We, huh?” she teased, and he finally looked at Veronica on the bed. She’d turned over, resting on her elbows and knees, slowly swaying her ass in the air.

“Fuck.” He exhaled. “Veronica.”

Logan licked his lips and pushed his boxers off, finally freeing his cock. Crawling behind her, he dipped his head to lick around her clit once more before pressing the tube around it and twisting the small reel at the other end. He watched curiously as her clit expanded within the tube as it was suctioned inside.

When Veronica didn’t respond much, he wiggled the tube until it slipped off. Studying her, he pulled her clit hood back and repositioned the tube. This time, after a few turns, Veronica gasped. He kept turning until she squeaked.

Gently supporting the tube with one hand, he reached up to wiggle the plug with the other. When she pushed back against him, the tube popped off. Again, he retracted her hood; this time, her gasp came on the second turn. Logan smiled as he continued twisting.

“Fuck," she hissed.

“Not yet, Bobcat. But soon.”

This time, Logan held the cup in place for a few minutes before wiggling it free. Her clit was reddened and a little larger than normal. Tentatively, he ran his fingertip over it, and couldn’t hold back his laugh when Veronica shrieked and pulled away. “Problem?”

“Holy shit, Logan. What…?” her voice trailed off.

“Your clit is a little bigger than it normally gets and… extremely sensitive.” He brushed against her again and she jerked away with a moan. “This will be fun,” he said as he rolled a condom over himself and lined up behind her.

Logan slid inside her easily as he ran his hand up her spine, pushing down between her shoulders to raise her hips higher and using his knees to push hers out further. He planted one hand on her hip and wrapped the other around to frame and expose her clit.

He started with short, shallow thrusts; she felt exquisite, hot and wet and tense around him. Veronica started to relax under him, so he began to delve more deeply at the same slow pace. A moan escaped her as the movement pushed air across her exposed clit. Logan began to move the fingers surrounding her clit as if he’s jacking her off, like her clit was a small cock.

Veronica buried her noises in the bed below her, her moans and cries muffled, but her hips matched his rhythm, pushing her clit through his fingers before pressing back against his cock. Logan stilled, letting her carry on their motion, enjoying her fucking him in her desperation for relief.

“Fuck, Logan, more. Please.” The tone of her voice was as rough and wild as he’d ever heard from her as her face, half turned so he could hear her, pressed into the bed over and over with her undulations. His hand moved from her hip to grasp the plug and pull up on it, spreading the tight muscles around it unexpectedly.

“Yesssss” she rasped as she frantically pushed against his fingers, cock, and plug in rapid succession. He watched her for a few minutes, randomly changing his angle and speed to keep them both aroused but away from the edge of orgasm.

Then, suddenly, he was done toying with her. He wanted to watch her come apart beneath him, and he wanted to follow her down.

“Stop.” He spoke gently but his voice held unmistakable steel. Veronica stilled and looked over her shoulder at him, a question across her face though she stayed silent.

Logan tightened his fingers against her clit as he pulled his cock almost all the way out of her.

“My turn.” he told her, then slammed his cock into her, fast and deep. He released the plug and grabbed her hip so hard she would be bruised in the morning. His pace quickened as he felt her tighten around him. The fingers surrounding her clit shifted until one rubbed lightly over it with every thrust while two continued to press against the sides. Veronica’s cries became more frantic, her movements more erratic against him. Leaning down, his breath whispered across her ear. “Come for me, Bobcat.”

Her keen was high-pitched as she thrashed beneath him and her cunt clamped around him. He pushed harder against her clit and gritted his teeth, focusing on her responses to keep from coming himself at the stimulation as he rides her orgasm down.

He rolled her over and slid into her again easily, thrusting shallow and short as they kissed. When they broke the kiss, he kissed her nose before resting his forehead against hers. “One more. You’re going to come one more time for me, Veronica, “ he told her, voice serious but tremulous, aware just how close he was to losing his own control.

“Logan, I don’t think… I’m so…” she stammered, her eyes wide and wild when their gazes met. He buried his cock as deep as he could go inside her, then ground his hips into hers, crushing her clit between his pubic bone and hers. She growled, her hands clawing at his shoulders and hips canting up against him instead of trying to finish her thought. His head dipped to attack her breasts, barely scraping his teeth off one reddened area before moving to the next. 

They slammed together over and over again, teeth and tongues and nails, hard thrusts and harder counterthrusts meeting at an increasing tempo until Veronica went taut and still below him, her eyes wide and unfocused as she was caught in an orgasm so strong, she couldn't make a sound. He only watched for a moment before the unyielding vice of her orgasm, coupled with his continued thrusting, drew him into his own oblivion with a shout and moan of her name.

When the gray cleared from his vision, he was crumbled on top of Veronica, his head against the crook of her neck, their chests both heaving in a search for oxygen. Her arms surrounded him, holding him in place when he would normally roll off her. Seconds passed before he realized that she had gone from gasping for air to quietly crying underneath him.

“Veronica!” Somehow he found the coordination to roll them until she was sprawled on his chest. “Veronica, what’s wrong?” he asked. She shook her head and started to calm down. When she finally met his eyes, tears started spilling down her cheeks yet again.

“Fuck, Veronica. It’s okay. Shh, Veronica, I’m here, it’s okay,” Logan crooned in her ear, running his hand up and down her back as he wracked his brain for what could have set this off, wondering if he should apologize but not really knowing what for.

When her crying jag became hiccups, she pressed her head into his chest and kissed the skin there. “It’s okay, Logan. It’s not you. It’s just… It’s not you. It’s the overload—sensations, orgasms… you. It was all good, so good…  maybe even too good. That’s one of the draws for me. It short-circuits my brain and I can just… be, and feel, and sometimes that includes crying. I’m sorry, I should have forewarned you. I just… didn’t expect it this time. It’s… been a while. A long time, actually, since I cried like this. I’m okay, Logan. You didn’t do anything wrong. You did everything right.” Her head weighed heavily into his chest, like she couldn’t hold its weight anymore.

Logan kissed the top of her head, then rearranged them into a more comfortable position and dragged the comforter on top of them. “Okay, Veronica, it’s okay. I believe you. I’m just… that will take some getting used to… but if it’s useful to you, I’ll figure out how to deal. I just need you to be okay.”

Her eyelids barely fluttered at his words, her breathing getting deep and heavy. As he gathered her closer under the covers, he heard her whisper, “Love you so much, Lo”, before she drifted away with a soft snore. He watched her sleep for as long as he could before he, too, fell asleep, wondering what else from his list they might enjoy.

**Author's Note:**

> Main and Chapter Titles from the lyrics of Brave by Josh Groban.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [(FanArt + Covers) VMHQ Smutathon III: Electric Smutaloo](https://archiveofourown.org/works/15255648) by [AlinaSorokina](https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlinaSorokina/pseuds/AlinaSorokina)




End file.
